coaching business stress

Truthfulness: be real or be nice

First of all yoga  is no acrobatics. Yoga is nothing more then a way of living with the ultimate purpose to calm down the mind, having the piano in your head playing a bit slower. What most of us picked up from yoga in the West is one part of yoga which is the physical part. And so it became for many just gymnastics . There is more.

For me yoga is a way how I deal with what happens in the world around me and how I react to that. In a way which is good for others and good for me. Let me share with you a few yoga principles and how that helped me many years in the world of business.

Yoga starts with being good for yourself and doing good to others. The do’s and dont’s. They call that the 10 commandments or 5 Yama’s and 5 Niyama’s. Yama’s are about moral codes, a guide to right living. The basics.

The second Yama is Satya or Truthfulness: speaking the truth to others and yourself .

For me in the corporate world this is about Be real or be nice.

I always said as a manager “It is always nice to be nice”. Well, I learned the hard way you cannot always be nice so others think you are a nice guy and to not have conflicts. It is all about the balance between telling what others need at that point in time and being nice. Sometimes it is better better to be kind then to be right and other times it is not. If you are always nice, others one day will take advantage of you. I know.. Sometimes you just should not be nice.

If you want to be liked , I suggest you start selling ice creams. Everybody will love you. The reality is that you cannot be nice to everything and to everybody. You cannot please everybody. That can only be done by a pizza.

The key message is to be aware of what you say, think and do. Act with compassion for others and observe what is your motive behind your actions. Will it really serve the other person or are you doing this because of a need to prove something or gain something. I have met so many people who just like to win a discussion just to prove their point. To be right or to be judged right is a hard lesson to learn.

My wife is a dog trainer. She always tells me “ Unwanted behaviour you need to address. If you don’t , it will continue and get worse “ . The same in business. If you accept every time things you do not like because you want to be nice, stop with that.  Next time , do something. Be real. With compassion.

Be honest to yourself. BASTA!

Fons

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