Alfred lives in Papua New Guinea in a small village at the East Sepik river with 100 others and is a guide. Alfred has 3 wives and 12 children and he is very happy with his life.
We met Alfred last month on a trip at this Sepik River and he guided us for one week through one of the last places in the world where people live without much contact with the Western civilisation. An amazing trip.
Alfred and his family does not know stress. The language he speaks is Tok Pisin and this language does not even have a word for stress or burn out. I checked it on the internet. They do not know what it is, so they do not need a word for it.
So why is they do not have stress, Fons ?
Very simple. Their life is very basic. There is no electricity, no internet, no Iphone, no computer, no shower, no cars, no bicycles, no light, no washing powder. They do not have money. They trade with others. Most do not know what a car is, what a lighter is, what a toothbrush is.
They have nothing they miss as they do not know it exists. There is no desire to have certain things. You can only miss things when you know they exist , but you do want to have them. They do not want others things as they are not aware of those other things. They are fine with what it is. It is what it is. No change needed.
With us it is different. We are attached to what we don’t have but do want to have. We want others to behave differently, we want others to treat us differently, we want other things. More things. The now is not OK. We are attached to the outcome. We are attached to the belief that when people or things change, our lives will improve. Prepare yourself for a small disappointment..
Attachment leed to suffering . Attachment is pain. Attachment makes us miserable.
As you no doubt have discovered, having what you want does not bring you that what you hoped it would bring you.
Stop attaching yourself the the outcome . Stop attaching yourself to what you want that the world around you does differently. Stop wanting to change the world because of you.
Detach from the outcome. Just be good for yourself and others.
Just try it for a few days. Just be good and do good. Nothing else.
For us, there is only the trying. The rest is not our business.
It is what it is.
BASTA,
Fons